How does it feel to be spiritual? Does it intend eternal bliss, or does it fix an immortal smile and solemness in your face? Or does being spiritual as well as feeling the same would impart happiness and peace in your soul?
I believe if any human could answer such questions, there would have been no pain and no sorrow……just happiness and plain smiles…..(obviously one would have got bored of such a life) Life is full of emotions (I am not trying to be philosophical), and is surely unpredictable.
When you start relating every part of YOU to something, and every part of your soul withers, in the absence of the same, one would understand the unpredictability in life. That one thing could be anything….human, inhuman, or abstract. I also did have something….something that was more than any other material happiness….bharatanatyam. It would sound very kiddish when I say this, but when more than half of your life (13 to be precise) you have practised the dance form, it penetrates in every move of your life. For nearly 4 years I was devoid of all the natta, nritya and every other aspect of natyam. One fine day I gathered guts and went for an enquiry, the deal struck and the guru was ready to accept me as a student. There was no boundary or border for the happiness that I met with. The same day she asked me to start off, guess what, I had to start from Allaripu. This is the first dance item that you learn in bharatanatyam. The dance steps are designed in such a manner that it looks as if a bud is flowering. Every hand and leg movement would conclude in the idea to blossom. However, I don’t know for what reasons, I have never loved it, I wouldn’t say I never “liked” it, coz every dance form has amused me in some way or other and I like all of them. So here I was with all the kiddos around, imagine there were only two who were in their college, all others were kids between 8-12 years of age, and I was standing at the back like HULK. Actual biggy in front of them. The first “tai” sent a rage of blood in my legs, and the next “taam” rushed warmth to my brains. I have never felt such satisfaction in life, a simple namaskar felt like complete surrender, surrender to the art form, or surrender to nataraja…the father of bharatanatyam. Every step and every expression on my face, only proved further the addiction to the art form.
Some may say that it is completely wrong to be narcotic to anything. But when one can feel divine and spiritual on earth atleast for once, then why not? Why not leave all apprehensions aside and chase what you love the most? Everyone does possess a secret wish, but it never comes out of the dark room. I say let it fill your heart, break through the skin, and flaunt itself. Every dream and every wish is beautiful…….